Hello everyone
Hope you had a great weekend.
I am back with another Funny post. Did you miss us?
So i went for shopping yesterday, it was so hot that i caught headache by the end of the day. The last two-three days were not good for me, i was feeling uneasy without any reason. Why do we crave for things that are not made for us and why those things which are not meant to be ours keep coming to us. There is a right time for everything i keep murmuring to myself for the last few days.
I got haircut too. Though i didn't like it much :)
Oh em gee....I've got two stubborn pimples....:(. Tried everything, but in vain...buhuhuhu :'(
Anyways, moving further, i am going to share an "Sports Jokes" with you guys. So without dragging this post that long, Let's get started shall we? :)
Anil Kumble and Sachin Tendulkar, now elderly, 85 and 80 years old are sitting on a park bench outside Lord’s cricket ground feeding pigeons and talking about cricket, past series and tours. Kumble turns to Tendulkar and asks, ‘Do you think there’s cricket in heaven?’
Tendulkar thinks about it for a minute and replies, ‘I dunno. But let’s make an agreement: if I die first, I’ll come back and tell you if there’s cricket in heaven, and if you die first, you do the same.’ They shake hands on it.
Sadly, a few months later, poor Kumble passes on.
One day soon afterward, Tendulkar is sitting there feeding the pigeons by himself when he hears a voice whisper, ‘Sachin….Sachin’
Tendulkar responds, ‘Anil, is that you?’ Yes it is me, ‘whispers Kumble’s ghost.
Tendulkar still amazed enquires, ‘So, is there cricket in heaven?’
‘Well, ‘says Kumble, ‘I've got good news and bad news.’
‘Gimme the good news first, ‘says Tendulkar.
‘Well… there is cricket in heaven.’
Tendulkar says, ‘That’s great! What news could be bad enough to ruin that?’
Kumble sighs and whispers, ‘You are going to open the innings this Friday.
Two men are playing golf one day. As they are about to start one of the holes, a funeral procession goes by on the road beside the course.
One of the golfers, Harry, takes off his cap and stands with his cap to his chest, and waits for the entire procession to go by. He then puts his cap back on and proceeds to tee off.
“Gee Harry, that was a very nice gesture on your part. It was very thoughtful and respectful of you to do that,” his friend says.
“Well,” Harry replies, “I was married to her for 30 years, it was the least I could do.”
Q.What lights up a soccer stadium? A. A soccer match.
Two guys were playing golf, one of them was about to swing the golf club when he noticed a funeral procession going by on the street. The man stopped in mid-swing and closed his eyes and said a short prayer. The other man truly inspired, remarked, clearing his throat, “wow that was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.” “Well”, the other man said “I was married to her for 35 years.”
What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball?
Get out of the way!
An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few minutes the old man farts and says,"Seven Points." His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?"
The old man replied, "It's fart football!" A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says - "Touchdown, tie score!" After about five minutes the old man farts again and says - "Touchdown, I'm ahead 14 to 7!" Not to be out done the wife rips another one and says, - "Touchdown, tie score!" Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeaker and says - "Fieldgoal, I lead 17 to 14!" Now the pressures on and the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he has but instead of farting he poops the bed. The wife looks and says, "What the heck was that?" The old man replied, "Half-time, Switch sides!"
Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The American jumped off and shouted "God save America!" The English man jumped off and shouted "God Save The Queen!" The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted "God save the person who I land on!''
It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley
Cup we haven't been to together since we got married." "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral."
Hope you guys enjoyed reading it. I will try my best to bring nice topics on sports, if you have any ideas or want me to write on a specific topic, tell me in the comments section below. :)
image source: 1
Hope you had a great weekend.
I am back with another Funny post. Did you miss us?
So i went for shopping yesterday, it was so hot that i caught headache by the end of the day. The last two-three days were not good for me, i was feeling uneasy without any reason. Why do we crave for things that are not made for us and why those things which are not meant to be ours keep coming to us. There is a right time for everything i keep murmuring to myself for the last few days.
I got haircut too. Though i didn't like it much :)
Oh em gee....I've got two stubborn pimples....:(. Tried everything, but in vain...buhuhuhu :'(
Anyways, moving further, i am going to share an "Sports Jokes" with you guys. So without dragging this post that long, Let's get started shall we? :)
Anil Kumble and Sachin Tendulkar, now elderly, 85 and 80 years old are sitting on a park bench outside Lord’s cricket ground feeding pigeons and talking about cricket, past series and tours. Kumble turns to Tendulkar and asks, ‘Do you think there’s cricket in heaven?’
Tendulkar thinks about it for a minute and replies, ‘I dunno. But let’s make an agreement: if I die first, I’ll come back and tell you if there’s cricket in heaven, and if you die first, you do the same.’ They shake hands on it.
Sadly, a few months later, poor Kumble passes on.
One day soon afterward, Tendulkar is sitting there feeding the pigeons by himself when he hears a voice whisper, ‘Sachin….Sachin’
Tendulkar responds, ‘Anil, is that you?’ Yes it is me, ‘whispers Kumble’s ghost.
Tendulkar still amazed enquires, ‘So, is there cricket in heaven?’
‘Well, ‘says Kumble, ‘I've got good news and bad news.’
‘Gimme the good news first, ‘says Tendulkar.
‘Well… there is cricket in heaven.’
Tendulkar says, ‘That’s great! What news could be bad enough to ruin that?’
Kumble sighs and whispers, ‘You are going to open the innings this Friday.
Two men are playing golf one day. As they are about to start one of the holes, a funeral procession goes by on the road beside the course.
One of the golfers, Harry, takes off his cap and stands with his cap to his chest, and waits for the entire procession to go by. He then puts his cap back on and proceeds to tee off.
“Gee Harry, that was a very nice gesture on your part. It was very thoughtful and respectful of you to do that,” his friend says.
“Well,” Harry replies, “I was married to her for 30 years, it was the least I could do.”
Q.What lights up a soccer stadium? A. A soccer match.
Two guys were playing golf, one of them was about to swing the golf club when he noticed a funeral procession going by on the street. The man stopped in mid-swing and closed his eyes and said a short prayer. The other man truly inspired, remarked, clearing his throat, “wow that was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.” “Well”, the other man said “I was married to her for 35 years.”
What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball?
Get out of the way!
An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few minutes the old man farts and says,"Seven Points." His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?"
The old man replied, "It's fart football!" A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says - "Touchdown, tie score!" After about five minutes the old man farts again and says - "Touchdown, I'm ahead 14 to 7!" Not to be out done the wife rips another one and says, - "Touchdown, tie score!" Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeaker and says - "Fieldgoal, I lead 17 to 14!" Now the pressures on and the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he has but instead of farting he poops the bed. The wife looks and says, "What the heck was that?" The old man replied, "Half-time, Switch sides!"
Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The American jumped off and shouted "God save America!" The English man jumped off and shouted "God Save The Queen!" The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted "God save the person who I land on!''
It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Stanley
Cup we haven't been to together since we got married." "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. That's terrible... But couldn't you find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?" The man shakes his head. "No,” he says. “They're all at the funeral."
Hope you guys enjoyed reading it. I will try my best to bring nice topics on sports, if you have any ideas or want me to write on a specific topic, tell me in the comments section below. :)
image source: 1
0 comments:
Post a Comment